Candor

We don’t really have much use for it from other people, do we? Like, I really don’t want people to tell me that my hair looks awful as I am letting it grow out (it does, I know, and there are imminent plans to cut it off! I’m a short hair girl). But there is this one girl at the gym who faithfully does just that; she does not like my hair like this and she tells me. She is one of those people who casts honesty wherever she is; I expect to get that from her, and I even appreciate it in a very weird way. There’s just something pure about a person shooting straight with you. Not in a hurtful inappropriate way, but in a way that totally bunks polite fibbin‘. And I can take it from her because she loves my hair short. She would often gush about my short locks, so I know where she’s coming from.

A friend and I are kinda hashing through some hurt that has happened in our friendship, and we are doing it with love and candor. It’s uncomfortable and unsettling. I wince at hearing some of her feelings, but she is totally sharing out of her care for me and her desire to reconcile our relationship. I can dig that. I can respond to that. There’s something that makes me feel very alive to peel away all the layers of superficial interaction, to put aside all the polite fibbin‘ and really communicate on a heart level with someone else. Neither of us knows what this may look like in the end, but at this point I feel that we are approaching it in the right way. So, we’ll see…

I think somewhere in the closets of our hearts we do appreciate (in a very weird way) somebody speaking truth into our lives, BUT resist the urge to open up a can of candor with me about the five pounds I gained while Chris was out of town. I know already, but thanks the same…

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One Comment

  1. Susanne
    April 29, 2008 at 8:04 pm

    Was just talking with a friend about this very thing. While I am not one to be “brutally honest”, I wish I had more guts when it comes to speaking my mind and saying how I feel. Very thoughtful post. Thanks for the challenge.

    Oh yeah, and just so you know…I’m prayin’ for you!